FilmFanatic.org

Synopsis:
A clumsy young window cleaner (Robin Askwith) working for his brother-in-law (Anthony Booth) finds it easy to bed his scantily-clad female clients, but really wants to date a sexy female cop (Linda Hayden).

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• Comedy
• Sexuality

Review:
Confessions of a Window Cleaner was the highest grossing film at the U.K. box office in 1974, and it’s easy to see why: full of naughty sexual encounters and low-brow humor, Confessions… is essentially soft-core porn on laughing gas. The script is filled to the brim with groan-inducing double entendres (“I don’t know what came over me.” “Well, it wasn’t me.”), and occasionally stoops a bit too low for laughs, as when Askwith’s pregnant sister (Sheila White) appears to be going into labor, only to let out a huge belch instead — but ultimately it’s all much too innocuous to find fault with. As “Timothy Lea”, Robin Askwith — who looks like a goofy Mick Jagger — is horny but has his heart in the right place, as evidenced by his sincere pursuit of marriage with baby-faced Linda Hayden. Followed by three Confessions… sequels, all starring Askwith as Timmy. Note the following refrain from Timmy’s theme song: “You’re not a loser, you just find it hard to win.” (!!)

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• An overall air of lighthearted silliness
  
• A bouncy ’70s score

Must See?
No; despite its historical popularity, this one isn’t must-see viewing — though it’s worth a look if you’re curious. Listed as a Cult Movie in the back of Peary’s book.

Links:

• IMDb entry
• NY Times Original Review
• Spinning Image Review
• Movie House Review
• TV Guide Capsule Review

Synopsis:
Edith Beale and her daughter, “Little” Edie (Jacqueline Kennedy’s cousin), live together in a decaying East Hampton mansion known as Grey Gardens.

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• Documentary
• Grown Children
• Nonconformists

Review:
After the success of their documentary chronicling the Rolling Stones’ tragic Altamont Speedway concert (1970’s Gimme Shelter), the Maysles brothers set out to make a film about Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis’s childhood — but their attention was diverted once they discovered the existence of Kennedy’s unbelievably eccentric aunt and cousin, “Big” and “Little” Edie Beale. The result was this beloved cult film, in which the Beales allow their quirky, unconventional existence together in a large decaying mansion to be recorded for the general public. Indeed, both Edies are exhibitionists, and seem to take genuine delight in “performing” for the camera: Big Edie considers herself a world-class singer, while Little Edie foster dreams of a dancing career, and we get to witness ample evidence of both their “talents”.

Viewers and critics often wonder whether the Beales — who come across as not-just-a-little unhinged here — were taken advantage of by the Maysles, but in truth, the Beales were flattered by the film, and enjoyed the notoriety it brought them; as a result of her newfound fame, Little Edie — always seeking the limelight — was even given the opportunity to perform in a nightclub. Diehard Beales fans have long championed this documentary, giving it automatic cult status, but it’s gained even more attention recently given the airing of an HBO special (starring Jessica Lange and Drew Barrymore) which fills in the gaps of the Beales’ lives pre-squalor, and serves as an invaluable counterpart to this film; both are must-see.

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• Remarkably quirky “performances” by both Big and Little Edie
  
• Countless humorous scenes — such as when Little Edie describes her “costume for the day”
  
• Many bizarrely memorable quotes:
  

  “He always compliments me on the way I do my corn.”
  “Of course, I’m mad about animals, but raccoons and cats become a little bit boring.”
  “You know, they can get you in East Hampton for wearing red shoes on a Thursday.”

Must See?
Yes, as a certifiable cult favorite. Listed as a Cult Movie in the back of Peary’s book.

Categories

• Cult Movie

Links:

• IMDb entry
• Roger Ebert’s Review
• SF Chronicle Review
• Q Network Review
• TCM Article

Synopsis:
A man (Richard Dix) despondent over the death of his wife puts out a contract on his own life; when he discovers his wife is still alive, however, he tries to reverse the contract, only to find that the man he originally contacted (Don Costello) has been killed, and a hired hitman (J. Carrol Naish) is determined to complete his job.

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• Hit Men
• Race-Against-Time
• William Castle Films

Review:
Based on one of the most popular radio mystery serials in American history, The Whistler offers a surprisingly effective cinematic translation of the show’s formulaic intrigue and suspense. Director William Castle — who went on to greater glory as the “schlockmeister” behind films such as The Tingler (1959) and Strait-Jacket (1964) — reportedly used “creative tactics” to elicit a suitably haggard and tense performance from wooden leading man Richard Dix, who wanders through the one-hour film desperate to reverse a chain of events he himself has put into motion; we can’t help vicariously experiencing his anxiety. Despite a few minor plot holes, The Whistler is worth a look both for its cultural significance and for the simple yet honest enjoyment it brings. Listen for the iconic opening whistled tune, which surely was an influence on Ennio Morricone’s scores for the “Man With No Name” films.

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• Effectively stark cinematography
  
• A clever screenplay with many suspenseful twists
  

Must See?
Yes, as a nifty little B-thriller.

Categories

• Good Show

Links:

• IMDb entry
• NY Times Original Review (Spoiler Alert!)
• SciFilm Review
• TCM Article
• Noir of the Week Review

Synopsis:
During the rule of Nero (Carlo Cattaneo), a Roman patrician (Amleto Novelli) falls in love with a Christian slave named Lygia (Lea Giunchi), who converts him to Christianity.

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• Ancient Greece and Rome
• Christianity
• Historical Drama
• Silent Films
• Slavery

Review:
Made in 1912, Enrico Guazzoni’s Quo Vadis? — based on the novel by Henryk Sienkiewicz — is widely recognized as the first feature-length film, and earns the distinction of being the earliest title listed in Peary’s book. As noted in Hal Erickson’s review for the All Movie Guide, it “nearly single-handedly convinced everyone in the movie business… that feature-length films were a viable commercial commodity”; indeed, audiences of the day flocked in droves to see it, paying 30 times the normal ticket price. With that said, the film comes across as undeniably “primitive and uninvolving” today: there’s no exposition or character development at all, characters are introduced perfunctorily through clumsy intertitles, and it’s assumed that audience members will simply bring their own knowledge of the story to fill in the many narrative gaps. The primary moments to watch for are the film’s sporadic “spectacles” — such as Nero fiddling while Rome burns, or lions being unleashed on Christians in a coliseum. (Film fanatics take note: it’s rumored that an extra was killed on film by one of the lions, but this footage no longer appears to exist, and is not evident here.)

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• Impressive early spectacles
  

Must See?
Yes, simply for its importance in cinematic history. Listed as a film with Historical Importance in the back of Peary’s book.

Categories

• Historically Relevant

Links:

• IMDb entry
• NY Times Original Review

Synopsis:
Promoter Abe Saperstein (Dane Clark) and his assistant Inman Jackson (Sidney Poitier) bring the Harlem Globetrotters basketball team to fame.

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• African-Americans
• Basketball
• Ruby Dee Films
• Sidney Poitier Films

Review:
Never released on video or DVD, this underground cult favorite — directed by cinematographer James Wong Howe, and starring real-life Harlem Globetrotters Reece ‘Goose’ Tatum, ‘Sweetwater’ Clifton, and Marques Haynes — tells the inspirational story of the Trotters’ rise to fame during the first half of the 20th century. The story arc itself — small-time players make it big through talent, hard work, and the dogged perseverance of their committed leader — is rather conventional, as is the gratuitous subplot in which Saperstein meets and quickly weds his beauty-queen wife (Patricia Breslin). What’s much more interesting are the implicit racial dynamics at play, as the Trotters (considered merely clownish amateurs) repeatedly compete against “legitimate” all-white teams; one wishes this theme could be handled at least somewhat more overtly, though the film remains daring simply in its easy acceptance of (Jewish) Saperstein’s friendship with Poitier and the other team members.

It’s great fun to see the Trotters performing some of their classic routines — and even for non-sports fans, the final climactic game (against the Chicago Majors) is genuinely thrilling! Sidney Poitier (just 27 years old) is fine if a tad underused in one of his earliest roles, while “everyman” actor Dane Clark projects just the right level of enthusiasm and energy required of iconoclast Saperstein. It’s interesting to note that, with the exception of a few unusual camera angles, there isn’t really much evidence here of Howe’s masterful camerawork (though to be fair, it’s hard to accurately assess this, given the damaged quality of the bootleg I secured). Film fanatics will be curious to learn that the movie’s producer and screenwriter, Alfred Palca, was blacklisted and had his name taken off the film (the pseudonym Arnold Becker was used instead); click here to read more.

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• Dane Clark as Abe Saperstein
  
• Enjoyable footage of the Trotters’ comedic moves
  
• The incredibly exciting final game of the film
  
• Slim Galliard’s jazzy score

Must See?
Yes, as an underground cult favorite.

Categories

• Cult Movie

Links:

• IMDb entry
• NY Times Original Review
• All Movie Guide Article

Synopsis:
When visited by an old boyfriend (Barry Primus) hoping to make a film about her, a former fashion model (Faye Dunaway) recovering from a mental breakdown reflects on her rocky past and relationships.

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• Faye Dunaway Films
• Flashback Films
• Mental Breakdown
• Models
• Roy Scheider Films

Review:
Faye Dunaway’s committed central performance is the primary saving grace of this pretentious flashback film, which is ultimately merely an ineffective imitation of its more esteemed cinematic peers (most notably 1965’s similarly themed Darling). Despite Dunaway’s best efforts, it’s impossible to care much about the film’s self-absorbed protagonist (loosely based on screenwriter Carole Eastman), whose rise and fall from fame is utterly unremarkable (a climbing star becomes petulant and difficult to work with? impossible to imagine!), and whose mental breakdown is never fully explained or justified. When Dunaway says to Primus early on in the film, “I don’t know why you want to make a film about me”, we can’t help agreeing.

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• Faye Dunaway as Lou
  
• Viveca Lindfors as Lou’s agent
  
• Creative visuals and editing
  

Must See?
No; despite its provocative title, this one can easily be skipped. Listed as a Sleeper in the back of Peary’s book.

Links:

• IMDb entry
• Spinning Image Review

Synopsis:
During World War Two, a young teenager (Richard Thomas) whose father (Richard Crenna) has enlisted in the Navy cares for his unstable mother (Claire Bloom) and experiences first love in the desert town of Sagrado, Arizona.

Genres, Themes, Actors, and Directors:

• Claire Bloom Films
• Coming-of-Age
• Mental Breakdown
• World War II

Review:
This sincere but disappointing adaptation of Richard Bradstone’s classic coming-of-age tale suffers the fate of so many filmed novels: countless subplots given criminally short shrift, and a host of minor characters who ultimately emerge as little more than caricatures. Throughout the course of the movie, Joshua not only cares for his troubled mother (Bloom), manages the household help (Nehemiah Persoff and Alma Beltran), and befriends an eccentric local artist (Harry Guardino), but is introduced to a host of issues — including troubled race-relations, sex, bullying, and more — at his new high school. For instance, the local twin tarts — colorfully named Venery Ann (Lynna Marta) and Velma Mae (Christina Hart) — aggressively pursue Joshua and his friend Steenie (Desi Arnaz Jr.), much to the ire of their unbelievably hicked out, shotgun-toting father (Strother Martin); meanwhile, Joshua is bullied by a couple of demeaningly stereotypical Chicano hoodlums (Mario Aniov and Pepe Serna), the latter of whom is unnaturally protective of his busty yet religiously pious and naive sister (Victoria Racimo), who goes on to meet an awful fate at the hands of psychopathic Aniov, who flees to the hills and is eventually confronted by the town sheriff (Gregory Sierra)… Well, you get the point.

Thomas — who went on to much greater fame the following year as John-Boy in “The Waltons” — tries hard to create a sympathetic protagonist, but his mannerisms (particularly his tendency to break into nervous laughter while talking) soon become irritating.

Claire Bloom as Joshua’s mentally unstable mother evinces a fine southern accent, but her character — all pampered melancholy and low affect — never comes to life.

Even more enigmatic is John Colicos as Bloom’s dilettante cousin Jim-Bob, a “professional house guest” who is clearly an irritant to everyone except Bloom, but whose background within the family is never explained; when Joshua finally tells him off during a pivotal scene, it’s an empty victory.

The best performances in the film are given by Joshua’s two closest friends, Steenie (Arnaz Jr.) and Marcia (Catherine Burns). Arnaz Jr. is wonderfully vibrant and amusing here; both his famed parents’ influences are clearly felt. Meanwhile, Burns (who co-starred with Thomas in 1969’s Last Summer) shows an impressive range — as in Last Summer, she’s precocious beyond her years, but here she’s refreshingly self-confident, a fine match for any self-possessed young man. Unfortunately, however, neither of these performances are enough to recommend the film as a whole.

Note: Note that nearly any review you stumble upon of this film (or the novel it’s based upon) will give away a major plot development which doesn’t occur until the final fourth of the film; be forewarned.

Redeeming Qualities and Moments:

• Catherine Burns as Marcia
  
• Desi Arnaz Jr. as Steenie
  

Must See?
No. Listed as a Sleeper and a Personal Recommendation in the back of Peary’s book.

Links:

• IMDb entry
• TV Guide Review (SPOILER ALERT)